I'm sorry I haven't been here in a while...I've been in mourning for a few weeks now. Poor old Fenella (my top bitch donkey or Equus africanus asinus to give her her full title) is no more. I'm not sure if she's actually dead, she's just fucked off somewhere with Big Trevor (a rampant 3 year old alpha male I bought as a treat for my harem of donkey bitches). Well I'm assuming that's what has happened. There was a bit of a commotion the day before she disappeared. I was down the field grooming her (not in a sick paedo type way), just some gentle brushwork and the occasional playful buttock fondle (I know she likes it when I do that). Anyway Fenella has always had a bit of a thing for me (must be my natural muskiness) and as a result of the aforementioned buttock fondling she started to get a bit frisky and began her usual donkey-man rape simulation which basically involves her using my body as a makeshift donkey dildo until she satisfies herself and goes back to her grazing. Up until this point Big Trevor hadn't really paid her or any of the others much attention (I actually thought he was a bit on the gay side if I'm honest and had a good mind to take him back to the bastard that sold him to me). However as soon as he saw us together he made a beeline for the two of us and was determined to interrupt our simulated coitus with a well aimed headbutt into Fenella's nether regions. He then more or less raped her on the spot and gave me a look that said 'back off motherbitch - this one's mine'. Poor Fenella, she looked quite distraught throughout her ordeal. As Big Trevor climaxed with all the donkey strength he could muster she just stared straight into my eyes and I'm convinced we shared one of those moments when, you know when you're sitting in a bar and you see a great looking woman but she's with some other bloke and she gives you a look that says, 'I fancy you but I'm with this plonker'...well it was a bit like that (not that I ever have got one of those looks in real life - usually it's more of a 'why the fuck are you staring at my tits - piss off or I'll get my boyfriend/husband to beat the shit out of you' type looks). Anyway I awoke next morning to find a broken fence and no sign of Fenella or Big Trevor anywhere. I reckon he's kidnapped her and is probably keeping her as his own private donkey sex slave in a field somewhere well away from civilization and public view. So she might as well be dead as far as I'm concerned. I doubt if I'll ever see her again. All I've got is some wonderful memories and lots of stains on my overalls. I suppose I really should pick myself up out of this depression I find myself in and go out and face the world once more. I haven't even interferred with myself since her disappearance, that's how bad I feel. Maybe I should go loiter around a public library or sports centre and cheer myself up a bit by stalking someone (though I can't even be bothered to do that). I'd go to the doctors and ask for some pick-me-ups but there's a restraining order against me which means I can't go anywhere near the place for at least twelve months. I think I'll give it another few days and then maybe head towards the coast and try some light flashing at the amusement arcades/parks/beaches - whatever's handiest.
Until then
I wish myself luck!
PS - Farmers and landowners - if you do happen to come across 2 donkeys (that's 'come' as in discover, not the rude meaning of the word) in one of your fields or outhouses (one alpha male and one sexually exhausted female) please let me know ASAP! There'll be a few quid in it for you.
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